**NOTE**  this is an old post, but I finally got a hold of the archived mp3 for the Midday show I mention below.  Enjoy!

My upcoming appearance on Midday with Dan Rodricks Show has had a kinda surprising side effect. After kicking around some ideas with the producer, I realized that over at least the past several years, approaching a decade even, I haven’t cooked any Korean barbeque. Like, AT ALL. Whiskey tango foxtrot.

It’s not that I haven’t mixed up the grilling a bit, what with stuff like pizza and such, and after all that’s what Korean, and for that matter pretty much any other country’s barbeque is – grilled. So I’m gonna chalk it up to my fascination, nay obsession, with American style barbeque over the past several years. And American style is of course, smoked, or at least cooked slowly over low and/or indirect heat. And before you terminology zealots go grabbing ownership of the word (and admittedly, I was one of you not so long ago), please read this. Etymologically speaking, the word “barbeque” does in fact describe a method of cooking that is closer to what we today consider grilling. Moving on.

Korean barbeque comes in a few different forms – always meat, almost never seafood, sweet, spicy, and even unmarinated. At a restaurant you’d typically find sliced beef, beef short ribs, pork, pork belly, and occasionally chicken, thought it’s not really traditional. The beef will most likely be marinated in a sweetish manner, while the pork and chicken will probably be spicy, courtesy goh choo jahng, or spicy Korean miso. The meat is presented raw, cut into bite-sized pieces. Diners then go about cooking it on a tabletop gas grill or charcoal brazier, and sometimes, sadly, on a lil’ butane-powered hibachi stove. Which, as one might expect, does a crappy job.

Accompanying the meat will be an array of condiments, generally including sliced raw garlic, sliced hot peppers, slivered scallion, and some dwen jahng (Korean miso). Big leaves of usually red or green leaf lettuce are served as eating implements really – you tear off a hand-sized piece, stuff in it some meat, rice, and whatever condiments you like (all benching, or side dishes, on the table are fair game, btw), wrap it up into a package in eat it in one bite. Yes, one bite people. It’s a simple matter of practicality, since a half bitten-into ssam, as they’re called, will almost certainly lose structural integrity and spill its contents all over the place. Thus one quickly learns that managing the size of one’s ssam is of critical importance. My preferred packet consists of rice, meat, a shmear of dwen jahng, scallion, and some kimchi.

Some of your nicer places will include a bowl or dwen jahng jigae, or offer a special deal if you add a bowl of neng myun to your order of meat. Apparently everything I described above is not sufficent to comprise a proper meal for us Koreans. Also, most barbeque dishes are available at most Korean restaurants, even if they don’t specialize in barbeque and thus lack tabletop cooking equipment. The meat’ll just come out already cooked, but usually not grilled. Anyway, that’s a typical restaurant experience.

At home…well my family at least never ate this stuff at home. Meat is expensive, and grilling wasn’t widespread among Koreans at the time, making this sort of cooking pretty difficult. It was purely a special occasion food, indeed korean barbeque is indelibly associated with church picnics in my brain. And on such occasions there was rarely any of the trimmings you’d find when eating out, at best some lettuce for wrapping, but otherwise you’d be more than content with a paper plate of meat, rice and kimchee. Usually the meat would be either bulgogi or kalbi, cut “L.A. style”, which is to say rather thinly sliced across three short ribs to produce an oblong piece with three ovals of bone at the bottom. It’s actually a cut I’ve never seen anywhere other than at a gathering of Koreans. The bones make for convenient handles, and the meat has good flavor but is usually not the tenderest of cuts, as this style is generally made from lesser grades of meat:

The thin slicing and cross-grain cut are meant to minimze the toughness, whereas proper gahl bee is made from good quality, well-marbled beef, and will usually be cut into squat chunks. But now of course, grills are way more ubiquitous (I think?) and we’re right in that all-too-brief money zone between rainy and oppressively hot, so on to the recipes:

Warning: All measurements are total guesses, as it is all done to taste. Significant adjustment may be required.

Beef marinade

1/4 cup        soy sauce
1/4 cup        hot water
1/4 cup         sugar
1 tsp        minced garlic
1 tsp        minced ginger
1/2 tsp        black pepper
1/2 tsp        sesame oil
1/4 cup         sliced onion
1/4 cup        slivered scallions

Good cuts for bool gog ghee: thinly sliced ribeye, thinly sliced chuckAdvice for gahl bee: Some supermarkets will have short ribs, but almost always with the bone in. Usually it’ll be a section of rib a few inches long. Cut the meat off the bone and into 3/4″ cubes. use the bone for stock, or grill and gnaw, then give it to your dog if he/she has been especially good. Asian supermarkets usually have packaged cuts specifically for gahl bee.

This marinade can also be used for chicken, or any meat for that matter

1. My aunt taught me this trick, and I’m convinced it makes a difference – in a small bowl, dissolve the sugar in the hot water first, then add all other ingredients and combine.

2. Pour over your beef, and massage thoroughly. I like to make sure to crush the onion and scallion a bit. Let stand refrigerated for at least an hour, and up to a day or two.

3. Grill.

Spicy marinade (good for pork or chicken)

2 tbsp        goh choo jahng
1/2 cup     hot water
1/4 cup        sugar
1 tsp        minced garlic
1 tsp        minced ginger
1 tsp        salt
1/2 tsp        sesame oil
1/4 cup     sliced onion
1/4 cup        sliverd scallions
some chopped hot peppers if you want it to be more spicy

Good cuts for pork: sliced loin, sliced belly, but it will be *very* fatty, and, well sliced any “chop” type cut really…. at a supermarket, if there is a butcher present, and you’re very nice, they will usually agree to slice a cut very thinly for you. Otherwise, buy a roast or thick chop and slice it yourself

Good cuts for chicken: sliced breast of course, but boneless thighs work very well in this marinade…after grilling, slice the thighs into bite sized pieces

1. Dissolve sugar in hot water, then stir in the goh choo jahng, then the remaining ingredients.
2. Massage into pork thoroughly, let stand for at least an hour.
3. Grill.

Condiments

-Leaf lettuce, any type that has tender, supple leaves to facilitate wrapping

-Dwen jahng and/or goh choo jahng for shmearing

-Rice, duh

-Scallions, slivered and tossed with a little sesame oil, soy, and red pepper

-Sliced raw garlic – yup raw garlic, it adds a sharp, almost spicy bite

-Kimchi, standard cabbage kimchi is best, but cucumber kimchi is good too

Glossary

I’m going to spell out the terms phonetically, to aid in pronunciation in case any of the 3 or 4 people who will read this ever decide to use it to order at a Korean restaurant. Sigh.

Protip: Korean is all syllables, and the syllables are short and abrupt, kinda like German maybe. Try not to elongate vowel sounds, particularly “oh” and “oo”, and keep them pure, sorta like a Minnesota accent, except much briefer (and thus less annoying – sorry Minnesotans!).

Bool go ghee – bool=fire and goh ghee=meat…this is probably the most popular barbeque dish, thinly sliced beef, usually ribeye but sometimes lesser cuts. It’s very user-friendly because of its fast cook time and tenderness. Protip: do not pronounce it “bool goh JEE”, because then it will sorta rhyme with the Korean word for vagina.

Gahl bee – Beef short ribs. They come in a few different forms, the default being in long-ish strips cut off the bone, usually tableside by the server. Then there is “joomoolook”, which are cut into cubes and I think may be slightly choicer in quality than regular gahl bee, and then there is the aforementioned L.A. style, which I don’t think is very common in restaurants. This cut takes a bit longer to cook, and is a bit more toothsome, but imo has the best flavor. I always get joomoolook gahl bee when I go out.

Jeh yook goo ee – Sliced pork that’s been marinated in gochujahng, slightly sweet but significantly spicy. I don’t think there’s a standard cut for this dish, I’ve had it made with very lean pork at some places, and with pretty fatty pork at others. Good for when you’ve been drinking, but word of warning, eating this before bed makes you have really weird dreams.

Sahm gyup sahl – Sliced pork belly. This is where bacon comes from, so expect the characteristic striations of fat and meat. This cut is often served unmarinated, and is good to eat WHILE drinking, since pork fat is thought to stave off drunkenness, and thus enable longer drinking sessions. Koreans know how to throw down man!

Dwen Jahng (Protip: barely pronounce the “w”) – fermented soybean paste… it’s kinda like miso, only stronger tasting and way stinkierGoh choo jahng – basically dwen jahng, except spicy, used as the base for soups, bibimbahp sauce, and as a condiment for barbeque…here’s a pic:

Dwen jahng jjee geh – a dwen jahng based soup usually containing squash, tofu, and sometimes meat

Goh choo jahng – Korean spicy miso paste, here’s a pic:

Mek joo ha na joo seh yo – “May I please have a beer”

BBQ season ‘09 foodnerd-style has officially commenced! In what was surely a personalized message to me from the universe (or Safeway’s marketing dept., whatever) I trekked to the supermarket at 10:00 p.m. to placate a serious Stouffer’s French Bread pizza craving when I happened across a truly beautiful bit of signage:

99 cents a pound for spareribs?!? Suh-weet! They only had 3 boxes left, so I grabbed those and because it was the last day of the sale, indeed the last couple hours, I then drove 20 minutes to the next closest Safewaw and got 2 more.

50 pounds of ribs for 50 bucks! To put that in perspective, spareribs from Whole Foods are 6 bucks a pound, or $300 for the same amount of ribs. But of course the big difference is that while flavor and texture are comparable, Whole Foods’ ribs are beautifully trimmed, as has been documented in this space in the past. So I thought it might be helpful to post about trimming up ribs at home.

Rib Trimming Tutorial. Begin.

Here we see a couple of racks from a box of the sale ribs (which were imported Danish fwiw). These are actually not so bad, since although the floating rib meat flap thing is still attached (highlighted in yellow), they have been been trimmed of the extra layer of tough meat and fat that’s sometimes left covering the actual rib bones. A notable example of this totally untrimmed style of ribs is Chaps Pit Beef, and their thoroughly disgraceful ribs.

In any case, you can see that this flap has small cartilaginous rods running through it at an angle to the rib bones.

And at one end there are typically some larger bones to contend with, but the whole section is relatively easy to cut away from the ribs.

Simply locate where the cartilaginous rods and the rib bones meet, both visually and by virtue of that fact that the flap will bend easily at the interface, and starting at the non-bony end, carefully and slowly run a very sharp knife right down the seam and if you’ve found the sweet spot, it should cut with minimal effort.

When you get to the bony part (can’t think of a relevant Napoleon pun sorry) lay the rack down flat and cut forcefuly through. Not too much force is required again if you are cutting through the correct area though, so move the flap around and again locate the joint before cutting.

Here’s what the two pieces look like separated. Now you’re left with what’s referred to as St. Louis style ribs above, and what’s sometimes referred to as “tasters” below. This is because that scrap meat is useful for testing seasoning and doneness when smoked along with the ribs.

Next turn the rack over and you’ll notice a semi-opaque whitish membrane covering the underside. The thing about this membrane is because it’s mostly collagen, it breaks down at a higher temperature than is employed for smoking. So in properly barbecued ribs, it remains tough and leathery – if this layer is soft and tender, you’re probably eating baked ribs, and should thus promptly go stand in the corner and wallow in shame.

The stuff has to go, so starting at a corner slowly peel this layer away. You may have to use a knife cut to get the layer off the bone initially, and using a paper towel will help with grip since the membrane can be slimy and slick.Also, it may not all come away in one piece, but peel away as much as possible in any case.

You may then notice there is yet another membrane below the one you just peeled away, and this is in fact what holds the ribs together as a rack (you can see some cross-grained filaments that give it an appearance similar to that of packing tape). Now this shit is really difficult to get up, in fact I’m not sure it’s possible without seriously damaging the ribs, so I cheat and simply cut through the layer between the ribs.

As you can see, though you must be careful to cut into the meat as little as possible, it’s important to cut through the membrane completely, and it will be fairly evident when you do because the cut edges will retract away from each other slightly.

By doing this, it appears to me that the membrane shrinks in toward the bone during cooking, and when eating the ribs, it is completely not noticeable. Mission accomplished.

So in this particular ten pound box, you’re left with 4 1/2 racks of trimmed ribs…

…and this amount of tasters. I was curious as to the final usable weight, and found that the ten pound box actually contained 11 pounds of meat – 8 pounds of trimmed ribs and 3 pounds of tasters. That comes out to a still paltry $1.24 per pound of trimmed ribs, not counting labor – it took me exactly fifteen minutes to trim the whole box for the record. Bottom line, awesome deal. I should’ve gotten more, because 4 racks is really only barely enough for one cookout. Oh well.

I’m totally making excuses, but yes the ribs are as dark as they appear in the pic above. It was a shitty, rainy, cold Saturday morning, and I was hungover, and didn’t regulate my fuel properly. The ribs were thus subjected to too high temp and were overcooked, resulting in texture and moisture deficiencies. Guh, when will I learn to always follow my own mantra – “You cannot half-ass ribs. Ever.”

And now for your viewing pleasure, a gratuitous drunk Rock Band video of my cousin Jerome trying to pull off the rare singer/drummer act a la Night Ranger, and a DAS BOOT (capitalized because you cannot just say “das boot”, you must yell “DAS BOOT” – this is a rule apparently) video from that cookout. Enjoy.

[There is a video that cannot be displayed in this feed. Visit the blog entry to see the video.]

[There is a video that cannot be displayed in this feed. Visit the blog entry to see the video.]

That’s right, I made me some PIT BISON! I think this may be a first, since searching “pit bison” returns nothing having to do with food, except for links pointing to yours truly…. It’s the largest mammal native to the US – the original American red meat. And it was grown right here in Maryland to boot, at Gunpowder Bison and Trading Company up in Monkton (see pic above). I only recently learned that a bison farming industry even existed in this state, but apparently there are around 13 farms of varying size. Maryland bison, incidentally, will be the subject of my next Citypaper article.

We drove up to the farm to pick up this beautiful (pretty expensive at $8.59/lb) top round roast, but Gunpowder Bison also participates in the fledgling Harbor East farmer’s market on Saturdays. I assumed it would be larger than a beef top round, but it weighed in at 3-4 lbs., same as beef. You will note that it is much darker, a visual cue to the nutritional properties of bison:

I followed the same process as for pit beef, applying a very simple salt/pepper/garlic rub:

You may notice a couple things in the next pic: 1) briquettes – I cooked the pit bison at a friend’s house to christen his new grill, and thought it too douchey to bring my own charcoal (I prefer lump charcoal for grilling); 2) the burgers (also bison) have holes in the middle – that’s a little cooking trick I use for fast, even cooking in my burgers:

The bison top round, charring away nicely:

The finished pit bison, resting:

Slicing thin is even more important here, because bison is denser and leaner than beef, so although I was too humble to bring my own charcoal, I was insistent on bringing my trusty meat slicer:

Slices of incredibly beefy – almost richly so – pit bison:

All tasters were quite impressed, in fact I would say blown away, by the aroma, flavor and texture of the pit bison. The charred “bark” was a bit dry, but the less well done interior was moist and extremely savory. Think of slightly salty, slightly bloody beef, times three and with no metallic hints. It tasted intense but clean, with richness coming from the flesh as opposed to fat. The pit beef went so fast I actually did not have time to get a pic of a completed sandwich. One important note is that I didn’t see anyone put any condiments on their sandwiches, a true testament to the bison’s deliciousness and juiciness. But then I was pretty drunk by then, so I could be totally wrong. Bison, especially a less tender and lean cut like top round, is unsuitable for cooking past medium doneness, because bison is so lean and dense. I actually brought along a few pieces of beef top round, which I then cooked to medium-well for folks who prefer their meat overcooked, heh. More on Gunpowder Bison and bison meat and recipes coming soon.

-Henry Hong

Like here if player is broken

Kimmel’s cliche, waka-waka zinger aside, I think it’s clear pRpnSJMcC hasn’t barbecued a rib in his life. Actually, that’s a pretty strong statement given how long he’s lived, but certainly not in a good long while and not on a regular basis.First, there’s the staccato stammering, excessive blinking, and repeating words to buy himself time to make shit up. Usually clear signs of prevarication, but I will concede that in pRpnSJMcC’s case, it could be attributed to his general suckiness at public speaking and/or general weirdness. I digress, but the guy looks like he’s wearing an Edgar suit when he tries to smile doesn’t he? Anyway, more telling is his boasting of being a “barbecue…grill…person”, not just because of the bad grammar, but because an actual “barbecue…person” would not include grilling in his/her skill set, and certainly not place it on par with barbecuing. Furthermore, people even halfway serious about barbecuing can instantly rattle of a detailed description of how they make their ribs. It’s true, go ahead and test it. PRpnSJMcC on the other hand, can only manage to blurt out a few obvious keywords.

Upon further analysis, I guess Kimmel could have been trying to stanch the bleeding and bail pRpnSJMcC’s ass out by lobbing that tired punchline. Conclusion, I call bullshit! I don’t think John McCain knows jack about barbecue, which isn’t so bad, but lying about it is class-A douchebaggery.

Despite the myriad uses of the word in modern English and regional squabbling over the topic, the etymology seems to be pretty concrete.

I guess the Spaniards kept decent records of their decimation of indigenous populations in the West Indies. In any case, “barbecue” derives from the Spanish barbacoa, which in turn comes from the Taino word barabicu(?), which is the word for a structure of sticks used to elevate stuff off the ground, including meat for cooking or drying. The Taino are also credited with inventing the hammock, and indeed the raised stick structure was also used for sleeping. So the classic image of a suburban guy chilling in a hammock while steaks are working on the grill is a surreal replay of a pre-Columbian scenario. Cool!

Eventually the word and practice spread and morphed – in Mexico, barbacoa refers to meat (usually a goat) that’s cooked elaborately in a buried pit, sort of a combo of steaming and smoking (it looks like the term may have been applied to an existent method of cooking). In southern Texas, the same term is used for steamed cow’s head. Barbecue has been practiced in the US since the 1600’s, brought along with settlers to the East Coast and Florida. It seems originally the term could be applied to the awesomely fun occasion that is the consequence of cooking and eating an entire pig. Virginia passed a law outlawing the firing of guns in the air during barbecues in the late 17th century, an eerie portend of July 4th celebrations in Baltimore.

The US seems to be the only country in the world where barbecue indicates long and slow cooking instead of direct-heat grilling. It saddens me to conclude that the barbecue-as-grilling usage may be considered more authentic, or at least closer to the original meaning of the word, if this drawing is to be believed:

This sucks because I’ve spent most of my adult life cringing when folks use “barbecue” and “grill” interchangeably. But there is no question that in the US, barbecue, both as a term and practice, is far more involved. Regional variants share major similarities, most importantly that the cooking is indirect and extended. The differences lie mainly in the type of meat used, seasoning, and sauce.

I am currently engaged in getting good at making ribs, and I prefer a sort of hybrid Memphis style. I use spare ribs, which I believe to have better flavor, and a sweetish rub.There is a sentiment out there that using back ribs is kind of cutting a corner, because they are generally more tender to begin with. I feel however that the trade off in flavor is not worthwhile. Some contend that back ribs are “higher on the hog” and thus better, but I need only one word to rebut that assertion: BACON. Spare ribs, well trimmed, all the way.

What I look for is ribs that are most, well seasoned, and tender but not too tender. Also, and this is just a personal preference, but I’ve always associated BBQ with a strong sweet component as far as seasoning.

I smoke with unseasoned apple and/or cherry wood whenever possible, for which I have a pretty reliable and reasonably priced [secret]source. I find hickory and mesquite to be way too strong,and have found pecan and oak to be a bit too mild. I think the apple/cherry diad is ideal (apple on left, cherry on right):

More coming soon….

-Henry Hong

In any case a few months ago, after maybe three years of pretty slapdash experimenting, I decided to document, as it were, one particularly good combination:

Writing down recipes is for chumps! Well not really, but this is more fun and less work all at the same time. The astute will be able to

narrow the ingredients sufficiently to reproduce it reasonably well. Actually that’s completely false, a bajillion spices could comprise layers of those colors. The pic does however represent ratio well, and with a list of the component spices, I think it should serve as a pretty good template:

• brown sugar
• sugar
• cane sugar
• nutmeg
• coriander
• black pepper
• cayenne pepper
• dry mustard
• onion powder
• garlic powder
• paprika
• white pepper
• ground ginger

Another sneaky ass trick I’ve been trying recently – smoking the rub! Yep, throw your spice mixture on some foil, and smoke it for an hour or so. The result is actually not quite recognizably smoky, but it does add something akin to smokiness. Definitely adds complexity:

410-383-2093

885 N. Howard St., Baltimore, MD 21201

Wednesday-Thursday: 11-30am-12pm; Friday -Saturday: 11:30am-1:30am; Sunday 11:30am – 10pm

I visitied Night of the Cookers – the carry-out annex, next door to the the dining room proper – after ending up on labyrinthine Howard St. while trying to dodge traffic. I’d heard that it had opened, but reviews/opinions were strangely non-existent. Anyway the place bills itself as modern Southern or some such variant, so I warily ordered a rack of ribs. As I did, the gregarious cook/chef excitedly recommended that I try his gumbo. Naturally I asked how long a roux he used (I go for the medium chestnut 25 min. flavor), and he replied that he cooks his for TWO HOURS:

Me: Uh, two hours? Just for the roux?”
Him: Yeah, uh, well, uh, you know how roux after you cook it for a while separates?”
Me: Um, yeah (thinking to myself, yeah that’s how you know you’ve fucked it up!)
Him: Yeah well I let that happen a few times and mix it back together.

Uh huh…. Well you never know, so I ended it there lest I spark an unnecessarily heated exchange, and went home with ribs, gumbo, mac and cheese, and greens.

Here is the gumbo, which logically, if based on a two hour roux should be very dark brown, but instead has a suspicious ruddy tinge (may indicate the presence of tomato, which is of course totally unacceptable):

The gumbo was oily and lacked depth, and worst of all, perhaps due again to the absurdly long roux cooking time, contained many shards of jagged ash, such as this one:

In three words, whiskey tango foxtrot?!? Even the andouille sausage was mushy and bland – how hard is it to order decent sausage, seriously?

The ribs were disappointing. I should have known better than to order them when I noticed a total lack of smoke in or about the place. I asked another cook what kind of wood they used to smoke the ribs (the menu indicates that they are smoked “low and slow”, and he squirmed disconcertingly. In any case, and obvious visual indicator of steamed/baked/boiled ribs is when the meat has retreated dramatically from the bone (although I now know that the use of a Smoke Chef is also a possibility):

And of course then there’s the absence of a pink smoke ring (not to mention flavor or aroma):

I believe these ribs were cooked conventionally, and the thin, again oily bland sauce did nothing to help.

The mac and cheese was actually one of the best retail versions I’ve ever had, and the greens were slightly above average. I guess I should try a sit down dinner before casting final judgement, but needless to say this does not bode well. Also I have a hard time justifying paying $23 for a plate of fried chicken when I can make a superlative version at home with my trusty pressure cooker.

Chaps Charcoal Restaurant

410-483-2379

5801 Pulaski Highway, Baltimore, Maryland 21205

Open Daily at 10:30 AM

As always, shitty cellphone pics means dead or forgotten camera – sorry in advance.

Like so many other foods, real pit beef is dying off right before our eyes. I happen to live within a few miles of Chaps on Pulaski highway, which I guess recently has attained a rep as the go-to pit beef spot round these parts. It’s pretty good but not really real. Two things should jump out at pit beef enthusiasts from the get go – there’s barely any char or crust on the meat, and it is way too tender (also a characteristic of the “pit” beef at Key Pit Stop, which I sorta reviewed for the Citypaper ‘08 Eat Guide). After peeking into the kitchen from across the counter, it’s immediately apparent that this place uses pre-prepared deli meat, instead of cooking from scratch. Now this may make some sense for pit ham, or perhaps even pit turkey, but for real pit beef, I need to have that deep, dark char and slightly chewy, bloody texture you get from medium-rare bottom round. Here’s my default order, the bulldog (pit beef, sausage, cheese), genius in concept if not execution:

The ribs here are actually worse than I could have possibly expected. They’re completely untrimmed spareribs, so in a full order you actually only get 3 ribs, with lots of the coarser “outside” meat, fat and gristle attached. Very unattractive. Plus they are obviously boiled or baked, lacking any smoke flavor at all:

…and then simply thrown on the grill briefly before getting doused with sauce that tastes like genereic supermarket or Sysco. Very bland and more akin to eating pork roast than ribs. DO NOT WANT! Note the total absence of a smoke ring:

There used to be a place out in Dundalk on Wise Ave. I think, that used to have good pit beef, and then there’s Little Texas, also on Pulaski, but I haven’t tried it yet. Anybody out there have any suggestions?